ChoiceWords Blog

Posts Tagged: sex

The Science Behind the Female Orgasm: Originally an Ovarian Matter (Maybe)

The female orgasm—it’s been researched enough to prove that it exists and what the female body undergoes before, during, and after orgasm. But another question remains: Does the female orgasm serve a reproductive purpose? We know why male bodies orgasm. From a solely reproductive lens, it serves as a way to trigger ejaculation and get sperm one step closer to fertilizing an egg. According to Women’s Health, during sexual stimulation, the vagina widens up toward the cervix while pelvic muscles tense up near the vaginal opening. After more stimulation prompts those muscles and nerves to build more tension, an orgasm happens as that tension is involuntarily released. “The big bang is the moment when the uterus, vagina, and anus contract simultaneously at 0.8-second intervals,” writes Nicole Beland for Women’s Health…. Read more »

Mind F*ck: Sex Ed Trivia Night with Feminist Union @ University of North Texas

Since the semester just started, Fem U wanted to host an event centered around sex ed and sex positivity that also built community amongst new and returning members. The top three with the highest scores won prizes with mystery bags from a local sex shop as well as fun giveaways and self care goodies. In addition to the trivia (which was free to participate in), the chapter had raffles that people could pay to be entered in and were a really fun fundraiser!  The event was held at local queer coffee shop called Q’s and the staff there were so amazing and supportive. The chapter plans to host a fat and body positive burlesque show in October during Love Your Body Week! We also had the Condom Club from UNT… Read more »

Breaking News: Sexual Education Did Not Prepare Me for Sex

Let me introduce myself. I am an upper middle class woman who grew up in a fairly prosperous area. I went to a middle school and high school that are highly ranked in the country. I am currently in the Honors College at a well-ranked public school on the pre-medical track. My friends, for the most part, are progressive and openly talk about sex. All of these factors, one may think, might make me more prepared for sexual encounters. This may be the case, but I still would not label myself as “prepared”. In fact, I think I was fairly far from it when I started having sex and still do not know as much about sex and sexual health as I would like. I have made many mistakes along… Read more »

Tell Me I Look Sexy With My IUD Strings Pushed Back: Let’s Chat About IUDs

Let me tell you a true story: I took the birth control pill for less than a month, and it made me feel horrendous. I gained weight, my skin broke out, and my pre-existing anxiety got even worse. This is where my first true love, my Mirena IUD, comes in.   I’ve never had huge issues with my periods. They’ve never been particularly intense or cumbersome, but, instead, merely just annoying and inconsistent. I decided to get an IUD by the suggestion of my doctor before I went to college. It felt like not only the responsible thing to do as I take my first steps into ~adulthood~, but also, the thought of not having a period for FIVE years sold me. If you do the math, that’s roughly seven… Read more »

What I Learned from a Year of Celibacy

  I was never taught to wait until marriage to have sex. My mother encouraged me to wait until I found the right person who I felt safe and secure with, and then I would know that I had found the one. Due to factors out of my control, I was not in control of my first sexual experience but when I found the right person in high school to have sex with, I felt safe and did not regret my decision. After my first time, I became enamored with sex. I thought about sex constantly, I was having sex consistently, and sex had become a part of my identity. My sexual identity began to change when I began attending a private Christian university in which sex was discouraged and… Read more »

Shaving, Waxing, and Squeezing: The Horrors of Sex Prep

When I was in 10th grade I found myself in a particularly peculiar conversation with my grandmother. I was on my way upstairs to take a shower and I had my essentials in hand. Of those essentials one in particular stood out to her – a razor. She stared at me and said, “I’ve never shaved down there in my life and I don’t see why you need to.” Pause. Was my grandmother starting a conversation with me about her pubic hair when all I wanted to do was take a shower? Yes, yes she was. Being the angst-ridden teenager I was and still regret to this day, I scowled at her and retorted with some angry response about having hairy armpits and not caring at all about her pubic… Read more »

Sex as Self-Harm

The writer acknowledges that this topic is a sensitive subject. They would like to post a trigger warning for those triggered by mentions of self-harm.  I’ve been chronically depressed since the age of 12. Which sounds ridiculously young, but that’s life. When my family made a drastic move from Michigan to Georgia, my once lively self became quiet and withdrawn. I was suddenly eating more than usual, hiding it from my family. After class I would spend time in my closet upstairs, holding my breath and thinking of ways to make growing up go by just a little bit faster. I didn’t wake up excited for what happened next, and I didn’t find the world full of endless possibilities. For me, living was just something I did. I had no… Read more »

Breaking: Bisexual Femme Actually Needs Birth Control

I started going to the gynecologist at the age of 17. My mom saw it as a rite of passage. I was a young woman, in my first serious relationship, and suffering with typical high school acne. In her eyes, of course I was going to get on the pill. Never mind the fact that the first time I asked my mom what sex was she claimed she had “never heard of it.” Never mind the fact that when I say the word “nipple” my mom tenses up to this day. We were going to do things the right way. The progressive way. Kristina was going to take ownership of her reproductive health, and get on birth control. I consistently went to the gynecologist for the next couple of years…. Read more »

The Uncomfortable Truth About TV Sex

There are a long list of things that are wrong with TV sex scenes. From the overall heteronormative approach most shows take, to the complete erasure of foreplay, all the way to that weird type of scene used to signify that “the deed is done” where both people fall back on the bed as if they had just both somehow been in an upright position facing the camera. (Seriously, can somebody please show me a position where that scene makes sense? Is this a common enough move that it’s acceptable for nearly every sex scene to end this way?) But alas, there are greater problems than the position in which nearly all TV love-makers end up. I’d argue that in a majority of TV shows that I’ve watched, there is an… Read more »

Demi-What?

Demisexual: “a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone.” Is this term new for you? It was new for me not too long ago, so don’t feel bad if you don’t recognize it. I stumbled across the term on tumblr—a place where I have learned many new words and definitions—and, curious, looked it up. And after I read the definition, I had to read it again. And again. And then I looked up more and more about demisexuality because finally, finally, finally, I had found the word that described my sexuality. I had never been sexually attracted to a stranger. I had never had passing thoughts of what it would be like to have sex with an acquaintance. In general, while… Read more »