Posts Categorized: Sex and Culture
Black Women Do Not Have to Be Strong All The Time
This past week on How To Get Away with Murder (04×06), Annalise Keating (Viola Davis) delivered another jaw-dropping monologue (2:30-3:06), debunking the “strong, independent, black woman” trope commonly seen in many books and movies–the very same trope that is often used and co-opted by non-black people as a joke. I have never seen another television show do this and I was completely floored. In this scene, Annalise is having another meeting with her therapist where she seems to be better at his job than he is. She interrupts him as he tries to use textbook tactics to get her to understand the depth of her own pain. “No, STOP. I’m opening up like you want me to and you keep steering me someplace… to get me to feel something, that… Read more »
The Resistance is Strong (And Wholesome)
I was going to write a scathing piece on the importance of keeping second-trimester abortions accessible. In thinking about my plan of attack for the article, I felt like news and think pieces attacking the current administration are plentiful, but praise is not. As we come up on a year since the election, I thought that I would share some good news and work coming from the people of the resistance. I hope that you, my dear reader, take a few minutes to bask in the magic that is shared bonds over struggle and political opposition. I hope you hug somebody you love and take a moment between reading the news to do something you love. And I hope you appreciate this roundup of good news, by people who are… Read more »
Buying Condoms is Not a Man’s Job — It’s Everyone’s
When I first became sexually active, I never bought my own condoms. I had this preconceived notion that the male partner in a relationship was the one responsible for buying condoms. It also did not help that I lived in a very rural town in northwest Kansas where the local grocery store did not sell condoms, nevermind emergency contraception or pregnancy tests. Looking back now, I realized that my belief around who buys condoms was a byproduct of a higher social norm for relationships: the man is in charge. The man is supposed to make the first move, ask the girl on their first date, and initiate sex. Since men are the ones expected to initiate the sexual part of the relationship, they supply the condoms. And in a way,… Read more »
The Witch Hunt We Need
In wake of the allegations against Harvey Weinstein (and more importantly, the real consequences being taken against him), many survivors of sexual assault are finding the courage to speak up. The #MeToo campaign and subsequent #IWillSpeakUp campaign directed toward men are prominent on social media all throughout the world. The reality of the statistic that 1 out of 6 American women will be sexually assaulted in her lifetime has been amplified to a disturbing, but extremely necessary degree. The weeks following Weinstein’s allegations saw more men in power being accused of sexual assault, including actor Ben Affleck and former president George H.W. Bush among many, many others. And the voices of survivors have not been fading out. Most recently, actor Kevin Spacey was accused by actor Anthony Rapp for assaulting him when… Read more »
Do Microaggressions Bring Out Your Inner ‘Dear White People’ Voice? Me Too.
Dear White people, I don’t have an attitude, this is just my face. Last summer I worked for a deli. Making sandwiches was fun, and there were a lot of Indian people that worked and lived in the neighborhood so the culture was cool to watch and learn from. One day I walked past the assistant manager, a white woman, speaking to another worker about the other employees: “I wish they’d just speak English!” It stopped me in my tracks! I was really disappointed that she thought that way. I realized although there was no excuse for her words, she probably didn’t think she was wrong for saying it. Microaggressions are dangerous because they force a prejudice thought onto another person. It’s like chipping away at ice, one knick at… Read more »
Hacks for People with Vaginas that Nobody Told You
I am forever in awe of the bond forged between women on the basis of trading advice. There is a special place in my heart for every woman who has offered me a little tip that has, in some way, helped me out. So, in the spirit of feeling far away from home and from all of the women older than me who I love the most, I thought I’d share some hacks for anybody with a vagina to appreciate. If you are having sex for more than 30 minutes, change the condom First off, you go girl. Second, extended periods of friction can cause tearing. A nothing wrong with a little bump and grind, but long periods of it can make your protection non-effective. Make sure you don’t become… Read more »
White People: Don’t Ignore Racism at K-State
This weekend, a Kansas State student shared a picture on her Snapchat account that rebounded throughout the student body. The picture was taken at our most recent home football game against Texas Christian University, which was delayed three times due to weather. The picture features two other people in white rain ponchos with the hoods up, masking their faces. According to the caption, they are members of the “Kstate [sic] Kool Kids.” The obvious problem here is that they referenced the KKK. This paints K-State and its students in a bad light, so many people have been upset over it. As it became a big talking point on campus, the Collegian, our campus newspaper, covered the story scrupulously. I am a copy editor for this publication, so I helped check… Read more »
Brown People Are Valid, Too
An Anne Frank Halloween costume for little girls recently sparked outrage on Twitter and beyond. The backlash occurred almost immediately, forcing the company to quickly pull the costume from the market. I completely understand why people are upset and I agree with them. Though the idea behind the costume seemed well-intentioned–the companies claimed they wanted little girls to be able to look at Anne Frank as a sort of superhero–the idea itself is exactly why it isn’t right. It is easy to read the story of Anne Frank and regard her as a sort of hero who held onto hope in the face of great adversity; but there’s a difference between her and Wonder Woman: Anne Frank was a real person. However heroic a person might think her story, it… Read more »
#METOO, I Was Twelve
Miyam Bialik wrote a piece for the New York Times in response to the allegations against Harvey Weinstein. The Weinstein Company mogul has been accused of sexually assaulting and harassing dozens of women throughout his career as a powerful Hollywood producer. In Bialik’s piece, women’s behavior and appearance are connected to the potential harassment they could be victims of. In her piece, she states that because she dresses “modestly” and doesn’t “act flirtatiously with men as a policy,” she has not had a bad experience with powerful men in Hollywood. The issue with Bialik’s argument is that it places responsibility on women, blames victims, and excuses the behavior of powerful men. It is important to talk about hyper-sexualization, objectification, and exploitative Hollywood culture. However, Bialik does not address these issues… Read more »
Why Trump’s Sabotage of Obamacare Is Terrible for Young People (and What You Can Do About It!)
The mainstream narrative portrays all young people as not needing insurance, but we know that’s the furthest thing from the truth. Amazing young activists showed up to say they need and deserve health care coverage and helped defeat the repeal of the Affordable Care Act (ACA) in Congress over the past few months. But now, the Trump administration is sabotaging the ACA all by itself through executive actions. Here’s just a few ways these changes will be terrible for young folks: Putting birth control out of reach by granting a License to Discriminate. Two new Trump administration rules allow employers or universities to deny insurance coverage of contraception for religious or moral reasons. Young people deserve access to birth control no matter where they work or go to school,… Read more »
